What to do With a Condescending Commenter | Bloggers Lair | Yakezie Forums

I am not opposed to those disagreeing with me, or even being a little condescending (I have one of those on another blog of mine – I think it is just 'his way').  When I put my opinion out there I know I am fair game for negative comments.  I think by handling them gracefully we show our faithful readers how professional we can be,

If the person is attacking another commenter, though, then I take action (usually first just a 'friendly reminder' and then deletion).  You can attack me, but not my followers!

I would caution everyone to be careful about hitting the delete button too soon.  I sometimes read a couple blogs about some TLC shows that are run by the same individual.  She moderates all comments and seems to block most comments that disagree with her point of view.  I once had a couple of mine blocked and when I emailed the mod she said it was because those particular comments were condescending.  All I said was "I don't know what the big deal is about <insert topic here>."    She said it was the "I don't know what the big deal is about…" statement that got the comment banned… but strangely enough those who AGREED with her are allowed to use the same terminology and the comments go through.  I don't really care about posting on that particular forum, but it is frustrating to take the time to compose a comment only to have it rejected due to a very loose definition of what is appropriate and what is not. 

I'd sneak into his house, late at night, and leave an angry response on his pillow.  Write the note by cutting words out of newspapers and pasting them to a piece of paper.  But don't do it in the right order!  Make him work for your rant.

Or, the heck with him.  If his comments bug you too much, delete or ignore them.

I take all comments…except the ones where people are linking to their sites in the body.  Don't leave me a four word comment and then ask me to check out your site and put the links in the body. 

Beyond that, comment away!  I had one guy last week on a topic that kept coming back (4 or 5 comments) to comment on everyone that disagreed with his viewpoint.  He got to the point where I could tell that he was foaming at the mouth behind his monitor hitting "REFRESH" every 5 seconds. I love those people! 

Spices up my day.

Post edited 1:14 pm – March 25, 2011 by freeby50

This is something I've struggled with myself.  I decided to just delete spam and anything outright offensive. But I generally leave anything / everything else.   Of course its your blog and your rules.

If its not outright spam and not something like racism or obscene then it gets harder to decide what is allowable and not.

On one hand I don't want to let any troll use my blog as a forum for their criticism of me and spread idiot crackpot theories or something.   On the other hand I don't want to be silencing criticism or deleting stuff just cause people disagree with me or point out my arguments flaws.

I usually ignore the jerks and I try not to feed the trolls.  But if a negative comment is what I consider an outright lie then I'll often counter it with the facts.   You don't have to reply to comments and I think most people will ignore the jerks and not see it as a valid criticism, but just someone being a jerk.

I occasionally get 'jerks' who bash what I say.  It can be hard to put yourself out there as a blogger and then have anonymous strangers take swipes at you.    I think its easy to get defensive as a blogger.  I took offense at it initially but later decided to just not care.   Sometimes their negative comments actually help me improve my blog.  They may be total jerks in the way they say it, but they might have a decent criticism.  

Theres also reasons to not get too upset about apparent criticism or negativity.

The 'tone' of a comment on the net is often pretty hard to perceive properly.   People may sound like jerks and not mean it at all.   A
question may sound like an accusation but actually just be a sincere and
totally innocent, harmless question.   Maybe someone said something that you took one way that they didn't mean.   Or maybe they just worded it poorly.   Maybe they don't realize how what they are saying comes across as bad as it does.  

You don't know who you're talking to on the net.   Maybe the person is not from your country.  Maybe they're a teenager or 90 years old. 

Maybe they're annoyed because you hit a hot button topic that is dear to their heart.  Maybe they are just having a really bad day.

A lot of topics in finance (except straight math) are subject to opinion in some way.   So its ok if someone else voices their opinion and also OK if my opinion annoys them.   If they sound like a jerk then that may just be incorrectly communicated tone that isn't really there.  

I know I've been critical of some blogs and if I do it enough it may come across as negativity.   One day I caught myself starting to say something fairly negative in response to an article on FreeMoneyFinance.   So I sent him a mail and apologized if my comments had been unnecessarily negative.   He said that most of my comments were negative but I wasn't a jerk about it.   If you read a blog all the time and comment a lot then some of those comments might be negative.   The negative comments tend to add up and stick out.  But maybe you've made lots of positive comments as well.   Someone who seems like a critic may just be a frequent commenter who isn't shy about sharing their opinion even when it disagrees with your articles.