How much money do you need to be happy and not worry about money anymore? I’ve asked this question many times over the past several years, and the answers have ranged from about $35,000 to $500,000 gross a year, depending on where you live and what you are used to. The range is wide enough range where you can drive a herd of skinny elephants through!
I hypothesize the ideal income for maximum happiness is around $200,000 gross a year instead of the ~$75,000 a year some researchers suggest. $200,000 a year is a level where you can make enough to do practically anything you want, in any city in the world, and still save some money left over. $200,000 a year is right below the threshold where the government starts going after you for more taxes, and right under the level where you start being viewed as an “evil rich person.”
Of course it would be nice to make $500,000 a year, or millions a year, but I posit that anything more than $200,000 a year won’t make you happier in your day-to-day life. The income might give you more freedom, but it can also make you sadder. What do you think?
HOW FOCUSING ON MAKING MORE MONEY WILL MAKE YOU LESS HAPPY
When I first started writing online, I was fascinated by everything from Google Adsense to the daily metrics of my site. It was a little addicting to see the dollars flow in and the readership grow. But, a funny thing happened after a couple months. The addiction turned more into frustration as the readers and income wasn’t growing at the rate that I thought it should. I became impatient, and somewhat delusional to think that I deserved more than my two months of writing was currently attracting. In other words, I was growing unhappy with my progress.
I began to think how writing online was the poorest hourly wage occupation in the world. It was also very lonely writing in the beginning since there’s always a disconnect between the quality of writing, and the amount of readership you have in the beginning. I’m sure if JD traveling down in South America with his millions writes a post consisting of three words: “What’s up guys?!” on Get Rich Slowly, he’ll probably get 100 comments! So instead of focusing on money and metrics, I made a promise not to check my metrics for at least a month and just focus on the writing and commenting on other sites. All I had was my Alexa toolbar, and that was good enough for me.
Over the next month, I felt amazingly free! I wrote because I had something to say, and I visited other sites because of their writing and my desire to get to know other people online better. One month of not checking metrics turned into two months, until about 4 months later, I started the Yakezie Challenge. The only metric that was by my side the entire way was Alexa, where my rank had already fallen to about 78,000 in December, 2010. It’s not a perfect metric by any means, it’s just the easiest to check given it updates everyday and I don’t have to click anything once the toolbar is installed.
I now check my income and readership stats about once a week mainly because advertisers ask. Also, I want to see if there are referring sites so I can hop over and give thanks. I still don’t want to focus on money, because I fear money will corrupt the writing and my attitude. Money is a nice addition and a necessary addition for survival, but the friendships created and the discussions that ensue after a post is written are worth so much more!
THE BASICS OF HAPPINESS
Memories. Health. Friendships. Love. Wealth. Family. What more is there?
Memories: Going back to the college diner where you had your first date, and ordering the baked spaghetti. That’s my choice of fine dining. Happiness is also simple things from the past that don’t cost much at all – old CD’s, action figures, a bouncy ball.
Health: Endorphins from physical exercise is intoxicating. Runners have the term, “runners high” for a reason. There’s nothing better than spending 2 hours running up a sweat on the tennis court and hitting a topspin backhand down the line. Oh, such a rare feat nowadays for my crickity shoulder. Soaking in a hot tub or taking an afternoon nap after a good work out is heaven. We’re in better physical shape as a result of more activity and hopefully, our health will remain high for as long as we live.
Career: Finding an occupation you like and doing it well to the point of maximum potential is incredibly rewarding. There are thousands of things out there one can do. We owe it to ourselves to find that thing we love to do. Happiest are those who would do their job for free.
Love: Coming home to someone, or having that last call with a person who knows you more than you know yourself. You could be broke, and still find unlimited amount of ways to spend time with each other and be happy. You’d rather be poor, than to ever lose him or her.
Wealth: You need enough to meet your basic needs, but after a certain amount of income or accumulated wealth, your happiness plateaus. As we discussed in the very beginning, the income range is quite wide.
Family: Your family, or the family you’ve nurtured in your activities. I count on my real life family for support and advice, and I’ve made a resolution for the past several years to see them more often. Being a part of the Yakezie Network is a great feeling given we all have a common bond. We know someone always has our back, and we will always have theirs.
THE THEORY OF UNHAPPINESS
Everybody has some level of happiness in the six points above. If all levels of happiness are the same for all people, then I’m not sure anybody would truly be unhappy, because I believe people are inherently optimistic. Being optimistic is a necessity for survival. And being happy is one important attribute to moving forward. Like attracts like and it’s important to believe in yourself.
Comparisons: The problem lies when you see someone with a better career, a nicer home, and a more loving family. This person also has a ton of friends and makes more money in a year than you will make in 10 years. To top it off he might even have the body of Adonis! Those bastards! You’ve seen people like this before and you can’t help but admire and envy. Why them, not me? But most people keep their envy to themselves. We all have some various levels of envy.
A bad situation: Imagine if you had no job, or a job that paid you peanuts with a belligerent boss. A horrible situation, especially if you see an equally capable colleague get praised and promoted. Meanwhile, you just broke up with your boyfriend or girlfriend, or haven’t had a significant other for a very long time. A depressing situation, especially since you have friends who’ve moved on to get married and have a family. Finally, due to a lack of income and companionship, you get into debt and no longer desire to stay in shape and eat your heart out.
If all these things occurred, you would naturally be very unhappy. Your insecurities start manifesting itself in further self-doubt and your self-esteem goes out the window. How come nobody loves me? Why can’t I get a job or a better paying job? Why don’t more people visit my site and love what I write? Am I that much of a loser?
We can manifest our personal insecurities into the hatred and jealousy of others. For a moment, it helps us forget the pain we have. To make us feel better we can: 1) Try and bring others down to our level, or 2) Try and work hard to better ourselves. It’s easier to try to bring others down in the beginning, but it usually never solves one’s own problems in the long run. Always control what you can control, because the world will pass you by if you don’t.
HOW CAN WE HELP THE SAD?
We’ll all cross that bitter dark cloud of a person at some point in our lives. The only way we can help is through empathy, compassion, and understanding. We’ve all had our dark moments before, and it is those who attack who are in their darkest moments. They are screaming for help and attention, and we should be compassionate enough to give it to them.
We might feel offended by their attacks at first, but once we understand their situation, we no longer feel insulted. All you’ve got to do is take the time to listent to what’s bothering them. I guarantee you something in their lives is causing a significant amount of sadness. It’s important not to show pity, as pity enrages. It’s really about true empathy where we offer to help out in whatever area they are hurting, that matters most.
If they insult us at work, we should ask to take some work off their hands to make their lives better. If they insult our writing, we can ask for their honest feedback and see if we can write something for them. If they hate us for our wealth, perhaps we can share with them some suggestions on how to increase their own wealth.
Whenever we are attacked, criticized, or insulted, we should welcome their feedback and try and do the opposite by offering a helping hand.
FOR THOSE WHO ARE UPSET AND WANT TO CHANGE
1) Believe in yourself. If you don’t believe in yourself, nobody else will. Your lack of self-esteem will permeate in everything you do. Those who believe in themselves carry a certain charisma that makes employers want to hire you. Your confidence will make people want to follow you, and men and women want to romantically be with you. The greatest asset you have is not your job, not your money, not even your family or friends for that matter. The greatest asset is you.
2) Reduce your tendency to compare. There will always be someone smarter, wealthier, better-looking, more successful, and happier than you. If all you do is compare yourself to them, you will sooner or later become miserable with yourself. Instead, change your mindset and try and figure out what made them successful. Seek their advice and mentorship instead of bashing them. Those who are successful believe there is enough room for many, not just a few.
3) Understand that very few examples of success comes easy. Know that the people you aspire to become (or hate), have put in countless of hours and perhaps plenty of their own capital to get to where they are. All you’re seeing are the fruits of their labor, and not what goes on behind the scenes. It’s easy to poo poo people’s achievements, and attribute their success to luck. But luck tends to happen to those who work the hardest. And if there isn’t hard work, then consider chalking up someone’s good fortune to good karma.
4) Realize your faults in order to improve. Everybody has faults. There’s a reason you might not be liked by your colleagues. Maybe you’re just not very nice and team oriented? There’s a reason why my site doesn’t receive more visits. It’s probably because I don’t write daily and market as much as I should. There’s a reason why no woman wants to be with you. Perhaps brushing your teeth and flossing once in a while might help? If we don’t recognize our faults, we will never improve.
5) Stop digging once you’re in a hole. You can either ride a rocket ship and participate in a virtuous cycle, or you can continue to dig and find yourself in a negative cycle. Most people forgive and move on. But first, you’ve got to forgive yourself and climb out of the hole like the insect you’ve become. The flood of rain will eventually come, burying you in the process.
RECOMMENDATION FOR BUILDING WEALTH
Manage Your Finances In One Place: The best way to become financially independent and protect yourself is to get a handle on your finances by signing up with Personal Capital. They are a free online platform which aggregates all your financial accounts in one place so you can see where you can optimize. Before Personal Capital, I had to log into eight different systems to track 25+ difference accounts (brokerage, multiple banks, 401K, etc) to manage my finances. Now, I can just log into Personal Capital to see how my stock accounts are doing and how my net worth is progressing. I can also see how much I’m spending every month.
The best tool is their Portfolio Fee Analyzer which runs your investment portfolio through its software to see what you are paying. I found out I was paying $1,700 a year in portfolio fees I had no idea I was paying! There is no better financial tool online that has helped me more to achieve financial freedom.
It’s 2015 and the bull market continues. Make a decision to be wealthy by taking control of your finances!
Regards,
Sam
I don’t think anyone needs a lot of money to be happy but money certainly reduces the stresses that come along with getting out of debt and paying bills. As far as work goes, of course I wish I got paid more, but I think my salary is fair and I’ve voiced my thoughts on getting raises and promotions with a fair amount of success. Once I stopped constantly thinking about how I wish I got paid more money at work I found myself enjoying my job a lot more and finding a better work/life balance which is worth a lot more than money imo.
I try to keep a positive outlook in life and all the roadblocks and challenges that get in my way. The quickest way to lose friends and be alone is to be negative all the time, complain endlessly, and put other people down. I certainly don’t want to live like that! I enjoy being nice to people and laughing about happy things. Life is too short to be miserable and mean to people. It’s a bummer there are a lot of cruel, heartless, and miserable people out there but if they stop and realize they are at the core of all that negativity, they can learn to change their life around.
Indeed. Having money is great for the simple fact that you are able to worry LESS about money if you want to.
I’ve tried to stay away from negative complainers. They bum me out. I’m always thinking to myself, “Pls, just try harder” or something of that nature.
It’s the meanest people who I have the most empathy for. I’m glad you’re very positive Sydney!
Great comment, Sam! If we are the source, then we should change ourselves. Also, there’s no need to enable others. We can help other people, but if they want to be negative and bring others down, we can actually help them out by distancing ourselves, projecting positivity and leading by example.
Much of the negativity in my own life comes from my own self-doubts or thoughts, so this is something I am always working on.
Sam,
This article is so personal for me. I began blogging initially in 2008. And, from knowing nobody on the Internet, I made friendship with some of the most successful bloggers including Leo Babauta. I was doing very well with the site but — six months of blogging — had not made a dime for me as I avoided running ads. Finally, I quit when I was about to reap huge benefit by having an opportunity to partner with Leo for the A-list bootcamp. My recent article on success has it all spelled out. But, you’ve hit the nail on my head with this my friend.
This time, I am not going to care about any stats or the money for a year as I have several sources of income. And, I wanted to be persistent and wanted to create real value for my readers before I even want to think about money. It will definitely come as a by-product if I work hard and write quality content.
Didn’t realize you know Leo! Are you in SF? If so, let’s go hang as he lives not too far away from me and it’s been a while since we had a beer.
Great attitude you’ve employed. Keep it up!
Sam,
I am in Atlanta. But, I may relocate to SF as my daughter is attending Berkeley. :)
Congrats on her getting into Cal! Not an easy achievement for an out of state student!
No Emory, Georgia Tech, or UofG?
She had admission in all three — GA tech, Emory and UGA but, who doesn’t love Cal? It’s San Fransisco, the best city in the world :)
She had admission to all three — Emory, GA tech and UGA. But, she loves SF and Cal. I noticed that on Pricenton review, UC Berkeley is in top 5 choices by students.
I agree with checking numbers and the frustrations that come along with it. Although I am a new blogger I am not at the stage where I am using advertising on my blog. I wanted to see how the audience would react to just me and me alone. I didn’t want my time being spent worrying about how much money was flowing in. I won’t lie there has been times where I’ve felt alone but lately I’ve had overwhelming (to me) support from some great followers. The key for me is to write from the heart, write like you are talking in front of a podium on stage. I want my readers to understand I want to teach them everything I’ve learned every step of the way. Trust is the key and with time that will come. When I do advertise I will let happen what will happen. I’m happy and love blogging and feel quality over quantity is best. I always say if I only help one person that will make the effort worthwhile.
Definitely try to avoid the temptation of over checking your stats when you first start out. Use that time to connect with others or write guest posts on bigger blogs if you can. It’s way more productive and fun this way!
I hope we are referring to circumstantial happiness and not true happiness.
When I was making a ton of easy money I wasn’t as happy as I am now and my ass is as poor as a church mouse.
I’m torn on this. I wrote a post on my site about the OTHER one percent who WILL hurt you (those who will hurt you for disrespecting them). It was based on a friend of mine who won’t debate you – he will simply punch your teeth if he feels you have disrespected him.
In that post I wrote that the main reason people attack others is because it has become ingrained into us to turn the other cheek, or to avoid controversy and just let it be.
Problem is we are only making it easier for that person to be empowered to continue attacking others. By standing up for ourselves, we actually help the next person down the line.
Sam – you were recently attacked pretty hard, but it was in such a hamhanded way that it made me laugh and feel sorry for the attacker. Your response not only stood up for yourself, but did it in a way that wasn’t mean or spiteful.
But you did it.
Because so many people were watching it took a bigger person to respond not out of anger, but out of concern to help. I don’t know what I would have done, but I was attacked fairly recently on Hubpages and instead of responding with an expletive-filled tirade, I just told him that I was sorry he had so much hate in his heart and that I hoped he found a way past it.
Happiness is about being comfortable with yourself. If that can be done on $25k per year, awesome. If it takes $500k for you to be happy, go for it.
I remember that story, and it was a good one! When I was growing up, I was that 1% who would fight back and hurt you. A guy tripped me ont he soccer field, said a nasty remark, and I threw him on the ground and stomped his solar plex with my heel. He never messed with me again! Another guy took my basketball and kicked it across the court yard, so I opened up my palm and smashed his right ear. His eardrum burst and he lost his hearing for one month. He apologized profusely and I accepted it.
I doubt those two bullies continued their ways into adulthood, b/c they certainly stopped bullying myself and others for the next 4 years in gradeschool.
Now, I’m just older, and more empathetic. It’s more fun to understand and learn! That said, if we can have a controlled environment, where we have a ring, some gloves, and ref, I will gladly fight anybody (unless you are Mike Tyson) in real lifmyth defend my honor.
Great post! I definitely have been a little guilty of being compulsive with my blog, the traffic, SEO, writing, and everything else. When I started noticing it was getting to me in a negative way I decided to knock it off and just write because I like to write. I also allocated no more than 2 hours/day to my site no matter what.
I really believe in the power of positive thinking. By chance have you read “The Secret”? It is sort of all about sending positive energy to the Universe and getting it back and about the power of positive thinking.
I think you’re pretty accurate about the $200K/year but it depends. Between my rentals, my income and my husband’s income, we surpass that annual figure (So far I make about $30/month off the site). I can say we are happy but still want to achieve more. If I don’t become as successful as some of the top bloggers I’m ok with that because we cannot all be great at EVERYTHING. I’m content knowing I’ve achieved more than so many and that alone makes me happy :)
Let me know when you get to $300,000/year. I’m pretty certain the happiness level won’t be much higher, if any… sorry to say. However, if your blog grows its readerships and you make just $1,000/month from it, I think you’ll be much more happier than a $100,000 increase in total annual income.
It’s all about progress! And those who are not progressing are very unhappy.
We are there already (combination of rentals, dual income, investments). I agree with the happiness level, it is the same. 300K and above is where we are at gross and of course my properties are not all paid off so they have a mortgage. I’m happy to say all have a positive cash flow though :)
I think I would be stoked if I made $1000/month off the blog and it would make me very happy! Not due to the money. It is something completely new for me and so it is pretty challenging. It would be a great accomplishment.
An excellent examination of what genuine happiness is derived from. The pursuit of money at the expense of all other things leads to an empty life. No one at the end of life says, “Wow, I sure wish I had spent more time at the office.” But lots of folk regret the time they missed with their families (because they were pursuing ever increasing wealth).
But what if one didn’t even have the CHANCE to spend more time at the office, since they were fired, or unemployed for a while? That would be even worse, b/c they haven’t even launched.
I agree though. I don’t want to look back and wish I spent more time in the office! Looking back just 10 years is certainly the case!
Sam, I believe that if one lives in a moderate cost of living area, the $75k to be happy holds. So many activities and joys are founded in experiences. How much you make is less significant than how you live your life. Lots of examples of food for thought.
I agree, which is why the range is so huge.
Very thorough and introspective post. I agree that it is usually something wrong with oneself that manifests in hatred and jealousy towards others.
I know those who attack are really lonely and/or financially hurting usually. Just read their bios and you can tell. Their negativity attracts more bad things towards them. Pretty sad!
I’ve yet to come across a person who is at peace and satisfied with his/her life who has attacked anybody. As a result, I always assume it’s something else that’s bothering them that has caused them to lash out. I’ve seen it so many times before with something that’s happened at work, or whatever. I’ve done it before as well.
It’s sad, I agree. Hence, the need for us to show empathy.
Much food for thought here. Fiance is definitely in a funk right now – but as I write in an upcoming post, acknowledging a problem is only the first step. You gotta have a plan to deal to it.
Sorry to hear about your fiance. What’s up? Writing is always very cathartic and cheap to do. Maybe you can make him write a post for you to lay out his thoughts, fears, and wishes?
To answer your question, I think it’s important to get to know someone before you attack them. It is easy to assume the worst or presume that someone else may have only selfish intentions, but it isn’t always the case.
Regarding the perfect income level, I think I would agree that 200k seems to be a more appropriate level… but it seems to be relative too. Many people can be perfectly happy with 60k per year. If we want to go the extreme, it’s also important to remember that a large portion of the world lives on less than 2 dollars a day.
Agreed. Let’s try and understand the whole story first before attacking. But, if one is miserable and jealous enough, then it can’t be helped. I understand that, which is why I’m OK with it.
Regarding the salary, best to let the person who is perfectly happy with 60K a year see how happy they are with up to 200-250K/year and make a decision. Although, what you don’t know won’t hurt!
It’s unfortunate there are so many unhappy people in the world. Too bad there’s no educational institution that teaches positive thinking and how to be happy. Or maybe there are. I don’t try to take things personally when strangers attack me, but I see acts of jealousy and aggression happen more often with other people than myself.
One thing you might want to work on, which is what I’ve worked on is to observe more acts of jealousy and agression towards ourselves. There is a correlation with how well you are doing, and the number of people gunning for you.
So, Sam. Now we know you earn $200k/year. After all who wouldn’t claim that their own income leads to perfect happiness? :)
Seriously though, this is right on. A very small number of people are truly happy about numbers (Warren Buffet is one). For everyone else if we focus on the pride of accomplishment, the enjoyment of new challenges, and the value of our contribution to others first it will lead to more interesting results. I’m interested in financial stability, but any time I reach that and try to push further to a level that isn’t needed it typically reduces my enjoyment and motivation.
You need to know what really matters to you. It can be a long journey to be the best version of yourself instead of being a second-rate version of someone else. But what else counts?
You got me! As, I try to write something that I actually know about, unless of course, I just stayed at a Holiday Inn Express! And I’ll give you another hint, I’m not claiming $200k/year is my income. It’s the base income level where I observed was good enough and no more happiness flowed through.
To put it in perspective, 29 year old MBA grads make about $150-$200,000 in my industry, so it is not that big of a deal and hope people don’t get hung up on this figure.
I like what you said regarding being a first rate version of yourself.
That makes sense as a peak, though some people may get close enough to the peak at a much lower income. I guess the point where the additional effort isn’t worth it varies depending on how your career/industry is structured.
That’s the thing though. If you are happy at $75,000… how will you know if you wouldn’t be even happier at $200,000 if you’ve never experienced it?
If you read the article I linked to, the ideas is to take the insights from someone who has made $35,000, $75,000, $100,000, $200,000 and more, rather than an academic, whose average salary is not coincidentally, around $75,000.
There’s definitely a marginal decline in return for your effort.
It’s finding where the MR and MC curve intersect!
To me, happiness starts and end in my head. I just decided that I was happy a long time ago and this thought never left my mind. I’ll be happy for the rest of my life; ’cause I told myself so. Pretty easy, isn’t? But it works perfectly fine!
Pretty easy to me! I think most of us are inherently happy and optimistic. I know I am. That said, if life gives you ENOUGH lemons eg you get fired and have been looking for work for a long time, and you can’t find any companionship, it’s understandable to get depressed and unhappy.
[…] For a different take, please visit Yakezie.com and read an in-depth post on Understanding Unhappiness And Those Who Attack. […]
That’s probably the range +/- $25k that I would also agree on for the exact same reasons you mentioned. You could fully fund all retirement accounts, still save, have a nice house, pay off debt and be able to enjoy some of the finer things. That said, I’m not there yet but I still love my life, because the smiles on my kids faces make up every dollar each time I see it!
Sounds good MB! And that’s the good thing for not getting there yet either. It means that you theoretically have even more happiness upside!
Happiness starts with finding contentment. If you’re always wanting more then you’re never going to be happy. As you mentioned at the start of your post, you think it’s around the range of making $200k/year. Well…I wouldn’t say that at all. The right person can be completely happy making $50k a year.
It all comes down to what we desire, what we’re happy with, and how we define happiness.
About the attacks: I think everybody that runs a blog has been attacked on some level. For me personally it has all come from the comparison aspect. I mentioned on my blog that I took a $70k pay cut and a few people that didn’t make much money were a little upset.
Of course you still try to help them – well….you should at least – but it’s hard to not have the initial defense mechanisms react and immediately try to defend yourself. Having you blog for awhile I think this gets better and you become more prepared to handle attacks wells.
I’d love to read that post about you taking a 70K pay cut to do something else. Feel free to highlight it here, or e-mail me. Would would a reader be upset with your own monetary choice? Maybe its b/c they really care about you?
It’s through my own experimentation that after 200K, one’s day to day happiness doesn’t get much better and plateau’s. Is this what you felt as well? Thx
Sam, here is the post to the $70k pay cut post: http://worksavelive.com/2012/01/how-we-survived-a-70000-pay-cut/
My thoughts on your comments:
First, I don’t think my readers have objection because they “care” about me. I’d say they’re more frustrated that somebody would even consider giving up that kind of money – because apparently all that we do and all that we are is defined by monetary value and material things.
The comments were more along the lines of: ‘taking a $70k pay cut?! Psh…I would never have any financial concerns if I made that much!’
Regarding the pay cut: there is no doubt, financially we’re unable to do as much as we were before. There are times where that is extremely frustrating, but it’s been so long that I’ve established a “new normal.” It’s challenged me to be more content with what I have and find “happiness” in things other than what can be bought.
With that said, it doesn’t mean I don’t strive to be great at what I currently do. That desire may or may not reproduce the financial gain that I had before.
For me, making a lot of money isn’t about what I can do with the money TODAY, it’s what I can do with the money later in life. If you blow all of your $200k of income every year on “happiness” and material possessions, then there will come a day when you can’t produce that kind of money and you’re going to be miserable (not “you” particularly, “you” in general terms).
I have received very similar push back on my article, “How to Retire Early And Never Have To Work Again“. Please have a read and check out the comments. Those who do not believe the message and the charts can’t be convinced, no matter how much it’s laid out! I think you will enjoy the article, as it meshes very well with your article and beliefs.
I agree with the $200K a year. In my situation, that keeps me happy. Of course more is always welcome.
Money can’t and won’t make you happy, though it can relieve some stress. I have found that many people who are unhappy are unhappy because they are jealous of others. I’ve had relatives who were jealous of my throughout all stages of my life. When I had no money they were jealous of my education and the fact that I am generally a well-liked person. When I had money they were jealous of that. They were unhappy not because of what they lacked, but because of what they perceived others of “having.” Sadly, I don’t think you can help people like that… though it wasn’t until many years of hurt feelings that I finally realized that. There will always be someone smarter, prettier, richer, more popular, healthier, etc. If you judge your own happiness on a sliding scale of what others have, you will never be happy. Period. True happiness comes from within. Not letting the haters get you down is a sign that you have achieved true happiness with your own life, I think.
Prolonged depression is a terrible disease and can’t be “thought” away. The power of positive thinking is enormous and I’m a true believer, but those with depression can’t get there. They need professional help.
Good point, Dr. Dean. There is a big difference between those who choose to be unhappy and those who can’t help but be unhappy because of a chemical imbalance.
This is something I’ve learned to accept and forgive. If things are chemically in imbalance with severe depression, or if one is schizophrenic etc, what can we do? Just accept, forgive, and offer to help.
If the world is deterministic, it’s all one and the same. In a way, nobody can help anything, because genetics and upbringing plays such a large role. Even the whiners can be forgiven for whining, because that is what the pattern of their brain is “making” them do.
On the other hand, even if you do believe in this (and I think it’s a reasonable thing to believe in, if you accept physics and mathematics), incentives still matter. Scolding those who are unhappy for less-than-valid reasons is still important, because they probably still have it good compared to others. If we can help these people be more happy either through understanding or through tough love, then why not?
I can’t say for sure what income brings the maximum amount of happiness, but I know that people can be happy on any income thy desire. I very truly believe in the power of positive thinking in all but the most extreme cases like Dr Dean pointed out. I would gladly take $200,000 a year to find out if I am happier though. It has been a pretty good model for a long time, so I usually look at Maslow’s Pyramid. The higher income you have the higher up the pyramid you can concentrate. Once you are onto self actualizing and you can help others as much as you want to I don’t think additional income will provide further happiness. Of course, this range will differ lots for each person like you said.
The good thing about not knowing, is that you have something to look forward to. And the secret to knowing, is to just read and ask those who’ve been there before!
I can say that I’m happy now because my wife and I bring in a combined income that is significant, but I am always looking for the next promotion or raise. For me, my priorities are financial security and to retire early. Until I feel that I’m in the position to do so, I will not be completely happy.
Makes sense, as someone whose family makes more than $380,00 a year, did you notice a level of income, combined at least in your case where happiness increases stopped? What do you think about my $200,000 hypothesis, granted it’s per person?
Eventually, we all hit a promotional wall, and it’ll be time to do something else.
There’s a lot to be said about writing for what you really enjoy. I’ve always written posts at MoneyMamba because the topic was something I was interested in, or because I had a viewpoint I wanted to share. Nothing compares to really enjoying what you write about – I’ve maintained a backlog of posts waiting to be published because I have more things that I want to write about every time I sit down.
Income, for me, is largely irrelevant. I think in the long run, anyone of any income can be quite happy monetarily, so long as they can excel in growing their assets. I would much prefer to earn $50k per year and grow my savings at a 20% clip than earn $100k per year, and grow savings at only 10%, for example.
Recent developments have really made me see the world in a completely different way. I’d like to get some traveling in, and get back into hobbies that I abandoned for the cycle of sleep, eat, work, repeat. Getting back into healthy habits, I feel, will help on multiple fronts, and provide a boost to every aspect of what I do – professionally and personally.
Sounds good JT. What are these recent developments you speak of?
I’d rather make $100k than $50k and save the same amount, but that’s just me.
Unhappiness is also a by-product of jealousy. To cure this one needs to take a very important step: stop comparing yourself to others. Everyone is different. Everyone’s success story is different. But if you look at stories of failure, there is always a common denominator – jealousy.
Great post, Sam! Really enjoyed reading it. I am guilty of checking stats on a daily basis. I should set myself free. :)
It really is amazing how freeing it is once you let go of stats. I don’t have any stats on FS (except the Alexa badge down below) and therefore they are out of site, and out of mind.
Does not having to worry about money equal happiness? I’m not so sure.. I am at a point where I can make pretty decent money in my career.. But I do have to worry about money constantly. If we ever got to that 200k mark, those worries would surely disappear, but I really am not sold on the fact that I would be happier.
Of your basics of happiness, I would rank wealth last.
My order would be “Family, Health, Love, Memories, Career, Wealth”.
My site is about 6 weeks old and I have been tracking the statistics daily. It is fascinating to watch the Alexa Ranking drop and other metrics climb, on a day to day basis. You are right, however, in that I probably should stop. Those metrics are going to plateau at some point, and probably soon. It would be much wiser just to focus on content and networking.
Having more money to survive and not worry about money is but one of many points to happiness IMO. As our roots are in the PF space, I started off with money in the intro and evolved in the post.
I disagree in a way, Sam. If I had control over a trillion dollars, I guarantee you I would be happier than having control over a couple hundred thousand. I could change the world with that kind of buying power, and leave a lasting mark. Who wouldn’t want that?
On the other hand, I believe we all have it very good, even with incomes of $30k to $50k. Travel to Ethiopia and see what real poverty is like before complaining how hard it is here, because it is not that hard here.
I don’t know if I had more money than God whether I’d be more happy.
Constantly giving and helping others hits a happiness and satisfaction threshold as well IMO. Perhaps the next step is simply enlightenment.
Your posts always give me so much to think about. Just to conclude, I really do believe in the power of positive thinking. I don’t know if they can move matter, but they can change the way we act, believe, and feel. So much of life is about what’s going on in our heads and how we feel about it, so in a way, we really can change the universe by changing the way that we think and feel.
I’ve been ‘hated on’ by several just because I am confident and do my best at what I do. There are always going to be those who are unhappy for reasons I can’t control. The only thing I can control is how I react or decide to act towards them. I make sure to continue to treat them with the same love and positive energy that i’d like to recieve. As you said, like attracts like. I agree and I also believe that positive energy influences more and far outweighs negative energy. Why get dragged down? Instead I focus on trying to lift others up. Life is too short to major in the minor. (I hope that wasn’t too many cliches)
I definitely believe people who attack are those who are hurting the most.
Just read the About pages of bloggers who are bitter. They are absolute rejects of society!
I know Jeremy from Vancouver in real life. He’s pretty depressed and scared right now after losing his job, and his girlfriend of 7 years. I feel bad for him, because a lot of his friends and guys pretty much know where they are going by their late 20s/30 years old, and he doesn’t.
He’s not very generous, and never pitches in to pay, but can you blame him? He’s broke and hanging onto a thread. Best to just feel sorry for him, and whoever else online that has attacked and move on. Some very good tips!
Who is Jeremy again? Kinda sucks if what you say is true about his job and girlfriend loss. Eeesh. Poor fella.
We can talk about alligator arms in another post!
I really believe in the power of positive thinking. Comparisons can cause a lot of angst. I prefer to compare and compete against myself to keep track of personal growth. When I forget and look at others, that is when I get frustrated as you mention.
I don’t know if there is a way to help the unhappy. Offer sound advice, but it comes from within.
When I was a CFO, many other executives did not like the message. Either I was turning down a budget request or telling them to cut expenses. It was not exactly a team building position. I don’t think it was ever personal, but the person fighting me never listened to the solution. It seems similar to the school yard bully who never listened to reason, but continues to pick on someone because he can. Lucky for me, the president supported what I did. Most people who are unhappy must find their own way to change. In some ways, it is like the drug addict who must hit bottom in order to be ready for the cure.
The glass is always half full for me, I have always found a solution to problems. Past success has helped me be positive despite what is going on around me. If someone is unhappy and they ask for help I will help them. If they do not ask, I usually refrain because they are not ready to listen. My only exception is my own children! I will stay on it until they are ready to listen. Thankfully, it has only occurred very few times.
I wonder if we should therefore encourage the unhappy to get super depressed to the point of oblivion in order to change then?
Money up to a certain level brings one level of happiness but not to everyone. Happiness is not achievable at all times and people have been trained to expect unrealistic ideals about it.
I have friends who have everything in the world: family, income, wealth, fun job all at the same time and yet they are unhappy. It’s not because of a disease although their therapists like to say so. Their values and ideals about happiness isn’t always theirs but were influenced by other people. You see your friends being happy with their 6,000 SF mansion but you may find that the same house doesn’t give you the same happiness that they enjoyed. If you don’t have a huge family, it’s more of a pain in the rear end.
Until people truly believe in their heart of hearts that “the grass is not always greener”, happiness will usually be difficult to find and money/income can’t affect that perspective.
Sounds good. So, you would agree with tip #2 to reduce comparisons with others:
“Reduce your tendency to compare. There will always be someone smarter, wealthier, better-looking, more successful, and happier than you. If all you do is compare yourself to them, you will sooner or later become miserable with yourself. Instead, change your mindset and try and figure out what made them successful. Seek their advice and mentorship instead of bashing them. Those who are successful believe there is enough room for many, not just a few.”
Imagine if you were in a business whose sole purpose was to use money to make more money. Now that is an endless cycle of desire that leads to unhappiness when it comes to income.
I agree with “There will always be someone smarter, wealthier, better-looking, more successful, and happier than you. If all you do is compare yourself to them, you will sooner or later become miserable with yourself.”
I would actually advocate creating your own standards that you can compare yourself to. Fill it with your own definitions of what is important to you.
My family have gone from wealth to times when we owned nothing except the clothes on our back and yet, we were happy through both situations. Some of the happiest time that I remember was when we had nothing.
One tip that I didn’t see was acceptance of the things you cannot change. For example, I can never be 6 feet tall so I just accept it and dealt with the issue head on when I ran into any situation that requires me to be so.
If you focus on living right at this moment, happiness can be achieved for that moment and carry you through other times when you’re distracted by living in the past or worry about the future.
At the end of the day, we can choose to be happy or unhappy as well. There are also people who will refused to be helped. I will offer a helping hand but I won’t masticate the food and hand feed someone who will spit it out.
I agree with that advice on accepting the things we cannot change. That is so very true. Accept and move on.
Well, so far, positive thinking hasn’t gotten me very far, but I keep trying. I don’t think I could intentionally hurt someone if I wanted to. I’ve always been the guy who tried to make everyone feel better.
Ed, what are the things you are looking for that you feel hasn’t progressed as far as you’d like?
The full story is much to long for a comment. The easy answer would be my finances. That’s the area where I am currently most stressed out, where every move forward seems to be accompanied with a setback of equal or greater magnitude.
But really, it would be my career or, rather, my lack of ability to start one. If I were able to move forward in this area, money problems would greatly diminish.
Money may not buy happiness but it certainly buys health. Money is the single biggest stressor out there, and stress causes 99% of diseases and ailments. I can’t fathom being happy if I wasn’t in good health!
That is logic that I follow. Stress kills… when I was stressed, my lower back and elbow would hurt. But, just being mindful of the stressors relieves the pain. Give me health over riches any day!
I love the details on this article, a great post indeed! For me being happy is not all about the money, it’s how you see things. Think positive, accept what you have, be contented, and keep moving forward. Always smile, each day is a blessing, be thankful, be happy and enjoy life.
A wise man once said, “Whoever says money can’t buy happiness has never rented a jet ski – try being sad on a jet ski!”
But on a serious note, some of the happiest people I ever met were some of the poorest I’ve seen, over in Guatemala. How can we help them? By being willing to share: not just money or material things, time.
Gotta say, I had the absolute MOST FUN on a jetski when I was in Cancun the other year. It is ridiculous how fast they go, and how high one can launch in the wave! Good saying!
I like the comment about reducing your tendency to compare. That can be destructive, as we then feel we have to constantly reach out for more, or to become ‘better’ which simply leads to a feeling of inadequacy.
Most psychologist researcjing happiness would argue that there are three types of comparison that make us un-happy: 1) comparison between us and others; 2) comparison between what was and what is; and 3) comparison between what we thought would be and what is. If one manages to avoid these one stands a good chance of feeling relatively happy most of the time. Snag is – not possible to avoid comparison because, as behavioural economics and sociology have found, all our judgement is formed in comparison and our lives would not be possible (or will end very fast) if we don’t form judgements.
Happiness and money is an interesting area – having enough is probably the key and then ‘enough’ is a very individual measure of things. When I was about six I discovered the gipsy part of town and started hanging around with them; in fact I spend a good month playing with the Roma children and being looked after the Roma ladies (it lasted till my mum found out and I was grounded for a very long time). These people didn’t have much; hell, they didn’t have anything. They lived is shacks, and we kids were lucky if someone threw us a piece of stale bread. But they were happy – they played there music and danced and laughed.
I believe in positive thinking but I also believe in the law of vibrations – I think that when people feel down they should listen to some gypsy music or music from Latin America. It picks you up and changes your vibrations to much happier ones. Research has also shown that people with depression react very well to harp music – apparently again something to do with vibrations.
Marie, thanks for sharing your thoughts. Very insightful on the three levels of comparisons! Very good food for though there.
No gypsies out here in the Bay Area, but I’ll look for some in my future travels abroad. :)
I can send you some music for your birthday :).
One thing that really change my way of thinking was taking a meditation class.
All of our life experience is the product of our own mind. We see the world as it appears to us, and NOT how it really is.
I used to spend about 8 minutes a night meditating before going to bed when I was younger. Thanks for the reminder. I will give it a go again. I try and meditate during yoga once a week.
I used to keep a screensaver that said “focus out.” It meant that I needed to stay away from the clusters of misery, paycheck bullshit, whiners and complainers and focus on keeping my clients happy.
I don’t have the screensaver anymore, but I keep the mantra with my writing. Focus out. Concentrate on my readers and honing my skillset.
That is a good reminder! I have a couple: 1) a picture of a starving child begging for food to remind me never to take ANYTHING for granted, 2) “the harder I work, the luckier I get”.
I do think there is a limit on how much money you make, and the amount of happiness achieved once you rise above that amount. I don’t know that I can say it is $100,000. or $200,000, I truly think it depends on the person. For instance, even if the money itself didn’t do it for me, I do have career aspirations, I want to go all the way to the top at a Fortune 500 company… and pay is in accordance with that. So I may achieve a lot more satisfaction from life with a position on a higher rung of the ladder, and the money is a derivative of that…but not necessarily the driver.
I wish you good luck on going all the way to CEO of a Fortune 500 company! Know that there can only be one at the top, so the odds are against you, and you might get very frustrated if you have set backs. That said, I wish you the best in your career aspirations and don’t forget about us little people when you get there!
I don’t think money can solve unhappiness (not to be confused with the depression Dr. Dean mentions.) I think positive thinking, fueled by perspective and thankfulness, can solve the unhappiness problem, though.
They say that money can buy happieness… but only to a certain extent. You have to be happy with what you’re doing in life in order to be truly happy. There are many folks out there making 30k/year and area happy as can be…. and there’s a lot of folks making 200k/year that are miserable.
Just imagine if the happy as can be folks making 30K/year start making 200K/year!
I firmly believe in positivity. I believe my positivity has attracted good opportunities in my life and makes me feel happy :-)
$200,000 a year??? Wow–you are shooting for the stars. But I like your enthusiasm:).
I am so very fortunate this year because even though I moved away from my family and friends several years ago, most of them are coming to various at various times throughout this year. So great! My Aunt Anita came for three nights two weekends ago, my Aunt Nancy and Uncle Andy came for a night this past weekend, and there is a Grossman reunion with all of my aunts, uncles, and my father happening in our home next month! Then in May, we are taking a cruise with my mother and stepfather.
Makes me feel so blessed.
[…] a lack of education, jealousy or delusion perhaps? Is it the same reason why people are unhappy and bitter? Let’s tackle some push-backs and see if we can get to the bottom of […]
Well, I must agree that money does not in itself create happiness. However, I am convinced that depending on where you live and your willingness to wait on your desire can form a feeling of happiness or sadness. I must agree that 200,000 appears to be the correct amount because you can just about have what you want at that level. There is something I noticed and that is the idea of struggle, there is pleasure in struggling and especially if you can look down in the future and see your desire being met. Visual success. There is a reward for saving for a short period and obtaining the item you desired–let’s say, a 80,000 dollar late model Jag–If you can envision making an extra $4000. Overtime monthly for a few months the down payment for that Jag is possible. The deferment is the struggle the reward is when you obtained the car the vision fulfilled is another reward because it leads to more possibilities and that alone is joyful. The very idea that one can WORK and actually obtain. This I think is a part of creating happiness. I’ve also noticed that having a big house but no-one to come over and share it with is also not in itself happiness–the owning the home–but the joy of having friends and family to share it with is the greater joy. Therefore, it is in my humble opinion that at 200,000 you can own a home, drive a nice vehicle, afforded to keep the maintenance up on all of it, save for your future and the kids future. If done correctly there kids future as well. To leave a good and honorable family name is important it’s not everything but it is important to give the next group of successful generations a chance. Money can help. That it…