It does not matter how much makeup one cakes on, how much money one spends on one’s wardrobe, how one does their hair, or how much Peaches and Cream scented moisturizing lotion one uses, nothing can ever cover up the stain of a publicly known mistake in a small town. I am a living testimony of such a lesson.

I was thirteen when my uncle was released from jail for statutory rape.  He approached me while we were alone.  He asked me for sex and I complied.  He was jail hardened and weighed over two hundred pounds. Why say no when that answer will provoke a violent response ending in getting what he wanted regardless? The way I saw it, I could have my virginity given away gently or I could have it taken from me.  After the fact I confided in Anna. She confided in her mother, her mother confided in my mother, and my mother confided in the police. My uncle was arrested and preparations for court began.

In a small town school, teacher –student confidentiality is something unseen and unknown. A meeting was held with all of my teachers explaining my situation. I cannot pinpoint one person, but I know that is how my classmates found out. Everyone treated me differently. Students openly bullied me in class and got away with it. For instance, Anna removed all of my papers from a folder and stepped on them. Many other things occurred before this incident so I went to the principal’s office to complain. When he asked Anna why she kept picking on me, she said “because she screwed her uncle and that is nasty!”

“It is nasty but this is against the rules so back off for me, okay?” I was flabbergasted. Yes, teachers were mean to me and referenced that I would never go anywhere in life because I was a whore. Yes, classmates would not talk to me because they said that I would screw their dads and take them to court for it. I should not have been surprised, but I could not believe that the principal was openly condoning students picking on me.

After that, it seemed that any method Anna could dream up to humiliate me she executed. Anna decided to write a two page petition about how terrible of a person I was. I should not be taking someone to court for something I wanted and if I would have been raped, I would have deserved it.  She taped it up to the girl’s bathroom wall. Every girl signed it. At the end of the day, Anna and her group of friends approached me with the petition in an envelope.

It did not take long for me to start agreeing with everyone. I thought that I was a whore. I thought that I was stupid. I thought that there was something seriously wrong with me. I thought that I was ugly and that I would never deserve anything good in life. In order for me to find any worth in myself someone had to find worth in me. This is when I became a perfectionist. I joined school clubs and excelled at them. I was the best person that I could be. Many goals that I never aspired for before were attained. Still, everyone thought that I was unworthy of respect. Everyone except for Anna, that is.

Out of the blue, Anna apologized to me in front of everyone. Everyone stared at her in awe. It was a daring move; one that could ruin her reputation with the entire school. I was just as surprised. I asked her why she had a change of heart. “You may have done something nasty, but you are a good person and you do not deserve this.” I decided to accept her apology.

Anna believed in second chances.  If she had not stepped in, I know I would have turned to drugs. I may still want to beat myself up when I make a mistake, but at least I have a future.  The moral reasoning behind the decision I made does not matter. I will leave that up to you. What matters is that everyone thought that what I did was terrible and Anna decided to forgive me for that mistake and give me another chance as a friend.

Because Anna decided to give me a second chance, I am sure to give everyone second chances. I believe that the reward of someone overcoming a prior issue is much greater than the pain and disappointment of someone failing.  That being said, if someone is not trying to overcome their problem after being told how to solve it, people should not be given many chances. You cannot force change on someone who does not want it. If everyone decided to at least give second chances, I believe that more people would be successful because most people just need to know that someone believes in them.