I hate feeling stupid. It drives me absolutely up the wall when I can’t figure out how to put the proper coding into my website for example. I feel so lost when I don’t understand what all my fellow online friends are talking about when they speak in acronyms. You know like, “What’s your CMS?” Huh? You want some Cold Meat Salami? Let me go check the fridgerator, be right back.
Of course the coder isn’t asking me for my salami. That’s just silly, unless he was a she, then maybe it might make more sense and be more acceptable. Whuh? He’s asking about what my Content Management System is. Ahhhhhhhhhhh, OK! Still, what the hell is that? I just use WordPress for my blog. Ain’t that good enough? Why speak in code? I feel dumb.
THERE’S ALWAYS HOPE DUMB DUMB
Since everything is rational, and I hate feeling stupid, I do everything I can to figure out the answer. I will raise my hand if I don’t know something, and I would rather understand how to do it myself than have someone do it for me. Unfortunately, there comes a point where no matter how much I learn, I will never be as good as Suba from Wealth Informatics or Forest from Frugal Zeigeist when it comes to understanding computers, internet, and software. And so, I give up.
It’s important we have some sense of realization what our strengths and limitations are. If you don’t know you’re a terrible cook, you might ruin your marriage! If you don’t know you’re not one of the top three starters, and always put yourself in the line-up, you’ll destroy your chances for making the playoffs! And if you don’t know that you have no business coding, you may very well play around with your site and cause it to crash.
So what do we do? The answer is simply to offer something in exchange for someone’s expertise. It could be money among strangers, or exchange of services among friends. Money is always a tricky subject between friends, and I never accept any money from any friends, unless of course they lose a bet, or if I make them even more money in the process.
With friends, it feels much better doing something for someone else in exchange as Invest It Wisely so eloquently demonstrated in his article, “Gain Time And Money Through Outsourcing And Trade“. Everybody has some strength that can be beneficial to someone else. Mine so happens to be negotiations and ensuring the successful completion of projects no matter what.
My mission is to always try and help someone far more than they’ve helped me. It might take a while, but I won’t give up until that mission is achieved.
KEEP THE FAITH
If you’re feeling stupid, don’t worry because you’re not alone. Raise your hand and ask a lot of questions, for rest assured others will have the same questions. The reason why the Yakezie Forums rock is because we talk about everything from personal finance, taxes, coding, advertisement, travel, lifestyle, blogging you name it. There are no dumb questions, only unasked ones!
Readers, do you feel stupid sometimes? What do you do when that sometimes comes?
How about them November unemployment data falling to a 2.5 year low of 8.6%? Rock on economy!
Regards,
Sam
HAhaha, nice. Got to admit though, the kids who sit in the front of the class raising their ahnds needs the occasional shake down. But, maybe that’s why there is a fear of asking too many questions!
More good signs about the economy, love it.
No shame in getting help when you need it.
I wish I was a programming whiz but I know I’m not. I still try to learn things a little at a time though because it’s fun and I want to understand more. I’ve acknowledged that I’m a 50/50 success rate cook so I order out a lot more now. The simple stuff I can do and if I use a recipe I’m usually ok but I’ve stopped trying to create my own. Lol. It saves a lot of food from going to waste :)
I have recently found my limitations with graphic design. I would spend hours (hours I tell you) on the smallest projects, mostly because I am stubborn. Recently I have started to outsource the tasks to someone who finishes them in a few mins. It is very important that you can’t be perfect at everything. As soon as you do , life become a lot easier.
No one can do everything (even though I have encountered some in my life who would argue otherwise about themselves!). I always ask questions when I don’t know something. Mainly because I am inquisitive and just plain nosey. I like knowing how things work. But even the best answered questions don’t always make me a subject matter expert and I am okay with that. And I am perfectly okay with that. Heck, life would be awfully stressful if I couldn’t reach out to others for help and, instead, was expected to do it all.
I know what you mean. When it comes to the intarwebz, there are times I feel dumber’n a box of rocks. The best cure for that is saying “help me to understand”.
I usually don’t feel dumb if I don’t know how to do a certain thing. Honestly, I look forward having someone help me and it benefits me by conserving my energy. I noticed by being an entrepreneur it’s always important to take advantage of others’ skills and do something I am better at!
You may look forward to someone helping you, but will that someone be look forward to helping you?
Sam, I waver back and forth between wanting to do EVERYTHING MYSELF. And realizing it is inefficient not to outsource. Of course, who doesn’t feel stupid sometimes!!! I usually don’t care. I figure if I need to learn something I will or I’ll hire help :)
Without being arrogant, I rarely feel stupid! I am secure enough in myself to ask questions when I do not know something. Almost everyday I learn something new. There are many things I would like to do better or learn, but I know my limitations.
Krant, if you never feel stupid then I’m going to hypothesize you aren’t challenging yourself enough!
Sam, I feel stupid trying to move from my Blackberry to an iPhone. I can’t seem to find how to tell Siri who is my wife and other important information…..I’m sure I’ll figure it out, with a lotta help!
I don’t either! haha. Well, I think when you buy the iPhone, they sync everything up from your Bberry anyway. The Genius Bar is always in handy.
I didn’t know Siri is your wife too! Now you have your wife on your phone and at home always hounding you and knowing where you are!
Hey Sam,
When I was younger, I thought I knew it all. Now that I’m somewhat older and more experienced, I realize just how little I know. So, although I feel more experienced in terms of “I’ve been there, before”, I also feel stupid pretty often these days! ;)
I’m also more aware of my own strengths and limitations, and I think that’s an important thing for anyone to find out so they can learn where they need to push themselves and where they can exploit themselves. Sometimes it’s just about getting over the fear, which can be a much bigger challenge.
Thanks for the shout out as well. :)
I have a theory that the people who feel stupid the most are the ones who learn the most and ultimately the smartest! They always question why, and how come, and won’t stop until they find the answer and understand the situation thoroughly. They don’t just accept the facts. This can be an impediment at times for sure.
I used to try and do absolutely everything myself. Call it my inherent frugality, or my desire to bootstrap everything. At some point, though, I realized that I was wasting so much time trying to learn every little nuance of something and do it myself, that I was missing out on other things that I actually enjoyed doing. There’s a tipping point where you have to realize that it’s better to find someone that knows what needs to be done and can get it done, rather than spend way too much time trying to figure it out yourself.
I agree about that tipping point. We just got to find out where and when it is, and how much it’s worth to us!
For me, I try to avoid anything that takes me twice as long as an expert in the subject would take. That doesn’t mean I don’t use a bit of free time to see if I can’t learn the subject, if it’s of interest, but for my immediate needs, I’ll outsource it.
I like that rule, finding an expert if it takes twice as long as a normal skilled person. I’ll have a think for next time. thx!
I can definitely relate, Sam! I’ve had quite a few conversations with fellow bloggers lately about the capability of Google Docs and such. Who knew that you could create a form in seconds and have all of the data neatly placed in a spreadsheet for your viewing at a later date? That would have been nice to know 2 years ago….
Yeah, Google Docs is great. A part of it is our desire to spend the time to learn and follow instructions.
Following instructions is tough sometimes, but if we spend enough time investigating, we can figure it out ourselves most of the time imo.
Yep – and even if you are good at something comparative advantage means there is someone better suited to it! (Yet I do lots of my site stuff myself…)
I definitely don’t feel “stupid” but I do know there are a lot smarter people out there than I am when it comes to certain things. These smarter people can usually do things so much faster or better than I can, so I defer to them whenever possible!
Firstly thanks for the shout out :). I have limits too and often have to refer to more technologically clever people! Just the nature of it all I guess.
It’s absolutely vital to get a network around you and start making use of those friends and colleagues and of course the more you can leave money out of it the better. Favors can be just as viable a currency as coins and notes.
Yep, I hear you. We just have to be careful asking too many favors, which is why I do my best to try and return the favor and then some.
Speaking of code, I was playing around with mine today :) And yes, this is good news about the economy :)
i’m the opposite. i feel stupid MOST of the times and have my few moments of brilliancy. I’m actually OK with that :)
Haha, nice. I like the humility. That means you get to learn a ton and never be bored!
[…] Feel Stupid Sometimes? Me Too And I Hate It! (Yakezie) […]
As long as I learn from my dumb questions/mistakes, I don’t mind too much :)
I think my readers are used to me admitting my “brilliance”. My latest bit of “I feel like a moron because I can’t get this” is understanding Feedburner and why my blog is now called “blog”. *pounds head*
Thanks for the shout out Sam :). I outsource too. We just have to play our strength and leverage other people’s strength for our weakness I guess. I am looking for a CPA and a lawyer now to complete my network.
Anyone know a good CPA in So.Cal?
No problemo. I don’t know any good CPAs, but Eric from Dollaversity seems to be excellent and very helpful with some random questions I had. I’d reach out to him. We’ll get him up on the Blogger Services page as soon as he becomes a full-fledged Member.
Best, Sam
Acronyms are one thing that can make anybody feel humble if you see a few of them flying around that you have no idea what they mean.
Bill Gates isn’t a brilliant software developer or code monkey…he’s a shrewd business man! It takes a smart person to admit when they’re not. Once you realize it- you can feel smart again for now knowing that you don’t know (aka conscious incompetence). The next step is- find/hire someone who does!
I once read an essay on how science and stupidity are closely correlated. It argues that if you dont feel stupid while conducting basic scientific research then you aren’t asking challenging questions. I think this applies on a general real world basis in that if you step outside of your comfort zone then you should feel stupid. If however, you never step outside your comfort zone, well then you might never improve upon anything. Kind of interesting…
http://jcs.biologists.org/content/121/11/1771.full.pdf
I actually believe in this theory 100%! If you never feel dumb, you aren’t really challenge yourself and will never progress. Good for those who are happy never progressing. I venture to guess most people want to get better. Thx for sharing!
I used to feel ashamed that I would have to ask for help. In fact I wouldn’t ask. I would learn the hard way. I felt like I needed to learn and that I wasn’t a good person if I didn’t know X. It was not a good way to live. I have since learned no question is a dumb question and that I can be a good person without knowing everything. It is an amazing feeling.
I speak a second language and sometimes feel dumb speaking it. I also feel dumb when I too don’t know all this website talk. The best advise you gave was to just ask. There is nothing else but let it be known that you need help. Thanks for reminding us.
[…] if you’re in the mood to get fit.I love the recent post by Financial Samurai titled “Feel Stupid Sometimes? Me Too And I Hate It!” because it reminds me of a lot of mistakes that I have made and now look back on with oh so […]